Losing Hair

The only way I can convey how I have been feeling is to give examples of situations in which one might experience the same emotions. Close your eyes--well keep them open to read this, and imagine these...

You are stuck in traffic. It is a hot day. You have to pee. You are hungry. The guy behind you is honking endlessly, but it is accomplishing nothing. You have begun a little mantra "Come On!". It does nothing. Traffic is stuck. Your gas gauge is drifting past the E. You have been there for hours not moving.

OR

You are trapped in a small, dark room. There are no windows. There are no doors. There is no light. You have searched every inch of the walls. You have banged on them, but they are solid concrete. You have screamed and yelled until your voice became hoarse. There is no way out. You can't will your way out. You can't talk your way out. There is no getting through.

OR

You are on a sports team. Your team has talent and potential. However, you never win. It is the last game of the season. You are all doing your best. You should win. You don't. Your best proves to not be good enough. You have tried again and again to win, but you are winless.

How do you feel when you imagine these situations? They are all hypothetical, but at least I am not the only one feeling frustrated, helpless, and hopeless now. Sometimes things are so dire that the best way to fix it might be to quit. Then, one day, today. The sun came out. There is a glimmer of hope. Hopefully tomorrow the glimmer will return. If not, at least it's a Friday and I have the weekend off and it's payday.
Work sucks sometimes. Sometimes I would love to be a stay-at-home mom to be. However, there are those days where you look into the eyes of your students and you see hope. You see happiness. You see the ways that you touch them. I would love for those days to outweigh the hard days. The days that you are so stressed out you could pull your hair our, or in my case eat a boatload of ice cream. And I have had a lot of ice cream lately.