B-E-A-T!!

Man, I feel like I can't catch my breath or keep my head above water lately. I came down with bronchitis two weeks ago. Shortly after that, Carson started screaming through the night. It ended up being another ear infection for him. However, a week later and he still isn't sleeping through the night. Now he is making it until 530-6am which is better than 3am until 6am. I am going for my Masters now, which is one night a week. I am also taking on some extra work after school. I will be teaching 4th and 5th graders ELA for one hour, three days a week. I look forward to the extra money to pay off a large window bill, but I feel like I am being pulled in a million different directions. I feel like I can't ever just relax with my son, I have even less time with my husband. What is suffering most is my work at home. NO such thing as a clean house, clean clothes, or clean dishes. Even more, no such thing as a home-cooked meal. I just don't understand how my mom did it, and how moms everyday do it. I feel like I am failing my family. Does it make me horrible that I have a messy house, my mom helped me out by doing the dishes, and we eat out everyday? I feel like a terrible person because of it, but I don't think that I should. I feel trapped inside my schedule. With no time for anything. Any thoughts? Advice? I know I look forward to summer when the schedule is a little more clear. Hopefully then my house will be clean and my family with have fresh, home-cooked food. Who knows, though...I think I suck at this parenting, wife, full-time worker, overtime worker, student thing.

My handsome men

I love the blessings that God has given me!! Especially my little man, Carson, and my hubby Greg. We just have so much fun together, and I see Greg growing into an amazing father. I have just been so happy lately because of their impact on my life. That's all. Another cutesie post :)

Marriage

Vacation was nice, because my hubby, Greg, was off the whole time with me. At first I was nervous, typically when we spend that much time together we fight like cats and dogs. However, this break was different. We spent a lot of time together as a family, however we did a few things with each other and our friends and were able to leave Carson at a grandparents house. It was really nice to kind of rekindle. We spent late nights cuddled on the couch watching some terrible people in prison, people doing stupid things, etc. We had a couple nights with our friends and a night out. It was just nice to put our relationship first for a change. I always missed Carson boy, but really enjoyed our time together. We needed this! We needed a chance to reconnect. It just reminded me of how much I really love that man. Now, I just need to remember that the next time he annoys me :)

The pics aren't from this vacation, but they are very recent. Come to think of it, we have had a lot of opportunities to be together lately (Nov-recent). I love it!

Where to begin?

So much has happened in this little time I cherished as my vacation...Christmas, time with family and friends, time as a little DeGlopper family, mom time, date time, and New Years. I have a ridiculous amount of pictures from that little time too. Maybe I will break it up and give your eyes a break!

The most unexpected aspect of my vacation was that Carson started walking. He started out Topsy-turvy one week and now is solidly standing, balancing, and taking upwards of 10 consecutive steps.



I finally realized one Sunday at church that God hadn't turned his back on me. For some reason I was so afraid of this, and kind of continue to be. Probably because I don't try. I don't pursue him. I don't communicate. I don't try. I always fail. I just thought one day that I didn't feel him around. I figured he had given up. All I could think of was the verse about hard hearts. The most refreshing thing this Christmas was the reminder of Jesus' love and his promise. I needed it. I was so down. I really had just figured I was doomed. I deserve it. But who doesn't? We all sin, we all fall short. I can't do anything to deserve anything except death. Thankfully, I don't have to do anything. God already has. So with that in mind, my break was better than ever. I made an effort to pray more, to avoid situations I knew would end up bad, and to TRY and control myself. However, even if I don't. Even if I screw up yet again, God forgives. Thank you Jesus for Grace!

So with that reminder and with Carson's undying love and enthusiasm this Christmas was the best ever!